Monday, February 15, 2010

Rules for Mardi Gras

Rule #1: Go with a lot of people, and make sure one of them is a celebrity look alike (preferably a B movie actor than cannot be confirmed, such as Jake Busey).

Rule #2: Do things that make no sense whatsoever all weekend... i.e. pissing ON porta-potties, talking to ONLY fat girls, blaring Spice Girl's music while cruising the strip, and asking to get arrested.

Rule #3: Bring 5 hour Energy Drinks.

Rule #4: If you go to sleep alone, but you wake up next to someone, it is not your fault if they get groped.

Rule #5: If Tyler Flagg goes with you, make him bring at least 1 shirt you can't see his nipples through.

Rule #6: Good BBQ is awesome. Good BBQ + a hangover, not so much.

Rule #7: If you encounter grown-ass men who intentionally dress as though they are the fucking Jonas brothers, tell them to their face they are douche-bags. We did.

Rule #8: Any of the food from vendors on the side of the street will taste awesome... but you will pay for it later.

Rule #9: If you bring a girl with you that you haven't "sealed the deal" with, she isn't your girl, and you probably shouldn't have brought her.

Rule #10: Take pictures. Lots of them. Don't let anyone see them until after the weekend is over, and make sure to take any gay or partially nude ones and use them as blackmail for as long as you can.

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